bend me till i break , lokelani

[bennett clauison]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,10,true][/style][atrb=style, width: 525px; border-bottom: 20px #241108 solid, bTable] TRYNA MAKE SENSE OF WHAT LITTLE REMAINS cause you left me with no love and honour to my name [style=height: 317px; width: 250px; margin-right: -520px; font-size: 8.5px; font-family: tahoma; text-align: justify; line-height: 1; text-transform: lowercase; overflow: auto; scrollbar-base-color:#DBBBA2; color: #000;]the papers on his desk shuffled around, nothing getting filed away or even organized into categories of dates or case, it was all just too much for the male to work through when his mind was too set on the idea of rushing to his girlfriend’s house and blowing out his birthday candles with his daughter by his side. he was in too much of a rush, his mind fluttered and flustered with the contrast of desires while he stayed seated in his chair in the early evening of the work day, nearly ready to jump up and head home but staying still, knowing that he had to get his work done. the papers continued to shuffle but it was a mindless task with no actual process coming to mind as he moved them around his desk, gathering more and more papers to the pile but doing nothing with them. the office, or his office, was shared among three missing people who had departed earlier that afternoon for a case while bennet had to brief the latest wrap up of undercover work that he had completed, and failed. his cover had been partly blown and his identity was deemed compromised and bennett was forced to retreat back to the desk work where he would stay until another major assignment reared his head. he hated being stationary in the office, not doing anything while his other co-workers were on the field, in the middle of the action. the paperwork was taunting him as he could have sworn that it multiplied by a huge number and was just growing and growing while the seconds ticked by and nothing was getting done. he wanted to pick up his phone, dial the familiar number and hear an angelic voice that would entice him to get through the paperwork faster but bennett knew that it was too risky of a move and the call could easily be recorded or traced back to his location, or worse, scoripia’s location. sighing, a hand rushed through the small spikes of blonde hair, tugging at the ends and letting out a low groan. a knock to the side of the door caught his attention and he tilted his head with a slow roll to the side, staring at the person who had a smirk on their face, ’what’s up Kensington?’

[/b], addressing the fellow police officer with his last name as protocol for social relations for the office called upon it to be used. his name was clausion most of the time, hearing the last name being called across the cubicles, rows of desks to get his attention but this time, it was at his door. nothing but air was exchanged between them in idle chit chat before he could hear the slow singing of not one or two officers, but detectives, captains, and the rookies who flooded into his office and threw it into darkness with the flick of the lights. ”awww guys, touching..”[/b], crossing his hands over his heart in an attempt to be sympathetic to the action that they were taking in celebrating yet another year of bennett. grinning ear to ear, he slowly rose up from his seat and met them in the middle of the average sized offices, leaning against the side of his own desk and glancing at the cake with the twenty eight candles, one for good luck, sticking out from the pastry. his name was written there, his age, even a small figurine of a cop putting down a criminal was stuck off to the side and resulted in a chuckle from the male. he shook his head, sucking in a deep breath as the song ended and as tradition would have it, blew out the candles in two breaths while making one wish—for things to back to normal.

bennet wanted nothing more than to be free from the restraints of both the undercover work that he did, though enjoyable, he was finding fatherhood to be far more rewarding and the limits that his own hunter was putting on him. he was not able to just walk into his girlfriend’s house or kiss his daughter on the forehead, or even inform people that he had a daughter. his name was left off the certificate for the same reasons as always, danger, but coral had his eyes and his nose, and even his wit. she was already starting to talk back to her mother which made bennett both proud and worried, wondering if the daughter was going to be a smart aleck like himself or would become tamer and cool down to be at her mother’s level. only time would tell but bennett would not be able to be there in anything but spirit during this crucial years, at least, not until the male was free from the target mark on his back. his thoughts escaped him with the cheering that came from the room and he stepped aside to allow the cake to take his spot on the desk, peering down at it and raising an eyebrow, ”this is really sweet guys, I’m touched…but did you have to put my full name?”[/b] he asked, chuckling before giving hugs to those that he was closest to in the female group and handshakes and fist bumps to the males that influenced his life. another knock to the door came just as bennett was reaching for the knife to slice the first piece, ”well good, glad to see that you are all gathered..”. an authoritative voice caught in and caused bennett’s head to raise, turning to see the commissioner, ”hello sir, end piece for you?’[/b] he asked but got a simple head shake in reply.

raising an eyebrow, bennett could take a peek around the male to see a slim figure, long black hair and a rather pretty but familiar face. his breath hitched as he realized who he was staring at and the knife clattered to the desk, slipping from his now sweaty palm as he reached up to cover his mouth, hiding his shocked expression in the form of an open mouth, ”middle piece actually..”, a sardonic tone being given in reply to bennett’s question but he nodded but made no move to actually cut a piece. ”well since this is a special occasion, don’t mean to take the lime light away but I would like you all to meet the newest member of this department..”[/i], but before the commissioner could get the name out, bennett did it for him, ”lokelani darling…”[/b]. the reason for him even being in the east coast state, the first love of his life, and the girl that had no idea that bennett clausion was her first love as he had been under the cover of a different name, a new age, which was corrected on the cake for all to read, that he was now twenty seven years old. ”…hey.”[/b] he spoke calmly as the other people seemed to disappear and he was left with the very visible figure of his first love.[/div][/center][/td][/tr][/table][/center]

THIS POST IS THE WONDERFUL AND PATIENT LILY WITH HER CHARACTER, LOKELANI

[/COLOR]. THIS POST TURNED OUT TO BE 1175[/B] WORDS, WHICH IS NOT TOO BAD. MUSE METER IS FULL[/B] AND BENNETT IS WEARING HIS UNIFORM. THE ONLY THING TO BE SAID ABOUT THIS POST IS OOH HERE WE GO..[/B][/div][/center]

[LOKELANI DARLING]

And through the rising and falling apart, We discover who we are

Lani woke up that morning felling odd. There was a different air surrounding her. Both her hands were on her forehead. Her blue eyes were glued to the ceiling. The cracks and foundation of the ceiling always made her worry, but she honestly never thought of calling someone up to fix it. This morning seemed to drown her worries about the construction of her ceiling and fill her with excitement. She dragged both her hands down her face before turning over and pulling her covers over her face. No matter how much excitement she showed, she always had difficulty getting out of bed. She had terrible insomnia but once asleep, she could never get herself to wake up. She had eight alarms just to make sure she heard at least once. Why? What caused this? It was simple. Lani had a disorder. It messed with who she was and what she wanted to be. She was bipolar, but to this point it was a secret. No one would be able to tell. She just had to take her many medicines and show up to her mandatory sessions, it landed her in the clear. She soon shook the cool air from herself and finally pushed the blankets away. Today was the day, she finished probation and was declared stable by the department’s own psychologist. She was officially part of the police department, it was an amazing achievement. Not to mention they accepted her for a scholarship to continue in school. The girl gave her closet a glance and finally rolled out.

The previous night she took a long relaxing bath. It set her morning for her; it was also a tradition for her. No anxiety, nothing, she was going to be calm, collected and herself. Lani stood in front of her closet in nothing but her undies and a tank top. She needed something more to wear, something official. The girl shuffled through her clothes. No skirts for her, she was not one for skirts. No she needed pants. She pulled out one of her many slacks, the girl only had a few jeans, but they were used for days off. She went to her ironing board and went on with her ritual. Ten minutes later she was in a royal blue designer skirt and black slacks. She chose black leather boots and grabbed her leather jacket. Her hair was left down and her makeup was minimal. No jewelry she was just herself, blue made her feel good. At the end she was grabbing her side bag. It contained her glasses, wallet, and keys. She pulled out the keys and went down stairs. “Love you mom. I’ll be home later.” She gave her mother a kiss on the head and was out. Ever since she moved here, she kept her mother out of a job and took care of her. It was something she felt she owed her. Her father was gone and Lani was all that was left. Half an hour later she was off the streets and in the parking lot.

The engine of her Suzuki roared until it was cut off. Lani took her helmet off and looked around. Finally, she was here. The brunette moved off of her bike and headed inside. How she afford the roaring machine? It took a lot of work and saving, that’s how. The girl made sure everything was alright before she went into the actual building. She moved around officers bringing criminals until she was at the front. “Hey. I’m Lokelani Darling. I’m here to see the Commissioner. “ she smiled at the officer. He nodded at her and before going around the counter. He led her to an office room. Lani walked in and sat down. She waited and waited. Her anxiety was beginning to boil. And just at the point where she was about to pick at her nails, the man himself strolled on in. He put out his hand and she gave him a firm handshake. The girl smiled at him. It was a lot of small talk. He looked over her rather large file and asked her personal questions. Lani answered them with brute honesty. Why she was here? Why she decided to go into this field? Who she was striving to be? She felt more was going to play out but it wasn’t long until a chorus erupted. On instinct, Lani looked over her shoulder and out the door. The Commissioner smiled and asked her to join him in the festivities. It would be a great way for an introduction.

The girl put on a face, a strong one, she tried to hide her nervousness as well as her anxiety, and then her excitement. She didn’t want to be seen in any bad way. She didn’t want to be just another rookie. Hell, she was allowed in the field and a gun. She was the one telling the police where to go, who to look for. She followed the man until they came to a stop at the door. Lani stood behind him and joined in with the ending. It wasn’t until she was the knife and who held it. Bennett Caluison? Twenty-seven? She studied his face and his structure, but she never changed her facial expression. She kept the calm façade. Lani Leaned up against the wall and crossed her arms. Lani was given an introduction which was finished by none other than Bennett, the lying, stealing, and other rude things she could say about him man. Lani faked a smile and nodded at everyone. At least he remembered who she was. And seeing him, well, it seemed he had a hard time with her surprising appearance. But she was part of this team and now he had to deal with it. And she had to deal with the fact, that she left, meant never to see him again. Lani watched each person leave. Some people shook Lani’s hand, others welcomed her with a pat on her back. They were definitely on with the fact they had a new member, or the fact that there was a rookie they could tease and give a hard time. She smiled at the last one until her blue eyes, made deep and piercing thanks to her shirt, landed on “Bennett.” Then he spoke. A simple hey. It was calm and seemed he had a moment to catch up really. “Hi Bennett.” The girl smiled. “I’m Lokelani, but you apparently know that. But honestly, I don’t know you.” There was no emotion behind it. She just said it and kept her look on him. In all honesty, Lani was now grown up, she changed and it showed.

BENNETT/HALEY, 1118 WORDS, OOOOOO :3

[bennett clauison]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,10,true][/style][atrb=style, width: 525px; border-bottom: 20px #241108 solid, bTable] TRYNA MAKE SENSE OF WHAT LITTLE REMAINS cause you left me with no love and honour to my name [style=height: 317px; width: 250px; margin-right: -520px; font-size: 8.5px; font-family: tahoma; text-align: justify; line-height: 1; text-transform: lowercase; overflow: auto; scrollbar-base-color:#DBBBA2; color: #000;]popularity had never been that important to the male but being good and kind hearted had been and that was how he gained the reputation that he had at the station. he was unorthodox in a lot of ways when it came to the force of the police and the power that he had but he was just when it came to his loyalty to his fellow co-workers who knew that his cover being blown was a blow to his ego and decided to try and make it better. it had been a rather good surprise and he was smiling and laughing with his coworkers while they all joked around due to the nature of bennett’s office clown behavior that he had. he was goofy but serious when he needed to be and there were moments that the tension that bennett brought could be sliced with a knife. the singing began and he gave a chuckle, standing up from his chair and moving over to the lit up cake, peering at it with a raised eyebrow. he was now twenty seven years old, had been in love twice and was a father to a child, an accomplished but sometimes unsuccessful undercover officer and he felt like he was on top of the world. looking at his age though, he felt like something was missing, as though loose ends were not tied and he knew exactly what it was. his first love never left his mind, she always rested there in the back of his thoughts, silent but observant of his new life and he often wondered what she was doing and even more importantly, why she just disappeared. questions like these were rhetorical as he had searched for her many times but came up empty handed and when he got reassigned, bennett knew it was time to move on—and he did, kind of. he loved his girlfriend with his everything that he was and would be in the future but there was always a chip on his shoulder that stopped from taking things further and it pained him to think that the brunette girl from his past was the reason why. his eyes widened to the sight of the commissioner at the door, attempting to joke with him which never worked out in bennett’s favor but this time, he played along and the male sliced through the cake with ease and handed the plate. the knife clattered out of his hand as he turned around to face the new rookie, his mouth falling open and resulting in many confused looks to occur throughout the room. he was floored to say the very least, having to use the edge of the desk to keep himself from toppling over in shock. his vision was blurry for a moment but a few blinks cleared that right up and he had to blink a few more times in order to make sure that he was seeing everything correctly—and he was. clear as day and beautiful as ever, the girl of his past was standing beside his superior with a look of apathy on her face while bennet was standing there with a stunned expression, contrasting against her cool façade. he hardly noticed that the room cleared out until he felt a hand to his shoulder, giving him a congratulations for his twenty seven years of life and then it was just the three of them. he opened his mouth to actually speak but found no words being parted from his lips as they were all stuck in his throat. the commissioner gave them a peculiar look, sensing a familiarity between the two of them, ”well since you two seem to be aware of one another…you should get to know each other again, you will be working mighty close. clausion, want that paperwork on my desk by tomorrow evening.”

[/i] and then he left, leaving nothing but the past to stand in the room. he physically flinched as she came closer and he took a step back, thinking of her as nothing but a ghost for a second.

shaking his head to her words, he finally stood up and tried to put on his own façade, though it was faltering to a certain extent. ”always the sarcastic one..”[/b] he muttered, running a hand over the skin of the back of his neck, rubbing it as thought that would subdue the awkward air between the two of them. ”what are you doing here?...”[/b] he finally asked though the question was an obvious one as the commissioner had stated her purpose of being the new rookie and that they were meant to be nice to her. bennett knew that his protective streak would cover her as well not that she was back in his life to a degree, ”…and where did you even go?”[/b], he whispered, feeling as though their conversation was not alone anymore. glancing over his shoulder, he looked down at the cake with a suspicious eyebrow raise but shook his head as he turned to stare back into her piercing blue eyes. there was tension between the two and it was rather forced when it came to even standing near one another as bennett had the desire to use paperwork as an excuse to get her out of his office and he was sure that she was not standing completely solid either. his hand reached up to play with the badge attached to his navy blue uniform, twisting his name tag around in an attempt to occupy himself with something other than the past. the girl had up and left him alone, with no question asked and she had the audacity to come into his town and have an attitude? the flip side was in his mind though and bennett had lied to her, per his job’s orders, and he had disappeared not long after her—it seemed that they were both in the right at this point, having key points to go along the excuse of up and abandoning one another when they needed someone the most.[/div][/center][/td][/tr][/table][/center]

THIS POST IS THE WONDERFUL AND PATIENT LILY WITH HER CHARACTER, LOKELANI

[/COLOR]. THIS POST TURNED OUT TO BE 1015[/B] WORDS, WHICH IS NOT TOO BAD. MUSE METER IS FULL[/B] AND BENNETT IS WEARING HIS UNIFORM. THE ONLY THING TO BE SAID ABOUT THIS POST IS SUCH CRAP X.X SORRY..[/B][/div][/center]

[LOKELANI DARLING]

And through the rising and falling apart, We discover who we are

It was her junior year. There was a brand new student, transfer from somewhere she didn’t try to ask about. He definitely got her interest. And she tried so hard to get him on one date. Her father really shown bright in her. She was persistent, and honestly she thought it was worth it. Kyle was amazing and in a month she was more than in love. She was at the right age for that, come eighteen, an adult, and she never felt like that ever. Lani and Kyle ended up reckless one night. It wasn’t that bad until she realized she missed her period. It went all downhill from there. She didn’t know what to do. She didn’t want him to leave her. In the end she decided it was better for her to leave him. She was more than positive he didn’t really the same way, it was only a month. She was the weak and stupid one. Her mother agreed to move. She was tired of being in California, everything reminded her of Lani’s father, not the biological one. Lani didn’t even have to convince her. It took two weeks to pack up and soon they were at her mother’s cousin’s home, here. Lani was fine. She finished school. Lani was excited about being a mother and hell, she was still part of Kyle. Until the summer when she was doing her applications. Then the miscarriage happened. She felt like she lost everything and ended up in psychiatric ward, being watched until she was stable. Lani contacted a friend and found out Kyle was gone too. He was going to leave anyways, and she felt better about what she did. He was the past and she’ll never ever see him again. Time to move on. And she did that.

She got married to guy for a year. They broke up and she moved on to a girl. They were pretty good. Went to college together, but she wanted to make it more serious and honestly, Lani was done with that stuff. Lani broke it off and continued to move on. It was easy, the medications made it easy. She was cold and closed off and she needed it for the job. She kept it that way. And she took the surprise better than this Kyle or well Bennett was taking it. She watched the knife fall onto the desk and smirk. She tried to keep herself from laughing. This guy was supposed to be an undercover cop and here he was, faltering. The girl watched him grab the desk and try to handle himself. He seemed to be really surprised. As for Lani, she was too. Oh in the inside she felt the same, but again her medication came in handy. Anti-anxiety medication, and about three other things to keep out a mental break down. It was perfect for now, for this situation. Lani looked at her boss with a sweet smile. “Thank you Sir for everything you’ve helped me with. I think I’m going to enjoy this job immensely.” Her eyes travelled over to Bennett. Her smile stayed, “Hello partner.” The boss left and she smirked with his reaction. It was interesting to watch how he was acting. He seemed to still be in shock. And boy was he in shock. Lani stayed where she was until she went over to his desk. She took the knife. It felt cool in her hands. She played it into the cake. Two slices into the cake and she was pilling a lovely piece onto a plate she picked up. She then grabbed a fork and took a seat in his chair.

Lani took a bite, “Mmm they’ve got great taste in cake.” She nodded and licked the fork. She dug the fork back in and gave him a look. “I’m here to be your partner in crime fighting wonders.” She ignored his sarcastic comment and continued on. Lani scooped another cut of cake into her mouth and chewed slowly watching him. She was pretty good at keeping her cool, actually in all honestly, her new attitude was finding this incredibly fun. After everything that happened and what she studied, she found a love for messing with people. And then the million dollar question came up. “Mmm, where did I go? And where did you go after that? Oh right back to your actual life I assume.” She took another bite. The girl’s eyes went over the office. She took everything in before her eyes settled back on hi. He wore the standard uniform, or what she guessed was their uniform. As for her, she didn’t have a uniform. Well she did, but it was only required when she was at some special event. Here she was just in what she came in. The girl another bite. “Whatever.” She took a deep breath and let it out. Might well give him the soap opera. They were supposed to be getting to know each other better. But honestly, she was standing in front a stranger. She didn’t know anything about him anymore. Name, age, probably everything he told her was probably made up. That was what broke her heart at this moment, more than when she found he left pretty much right after her. “Well, Bennett,” it was odd saying his actual name. She saw him and all she wanted to do was call him Kyle.

“I left to come here. My mom had a cousin here. I asked her if we could move.” She took another bite and looked at that stuff on the desk. “I should help you with all this stuff.” She ate another bite, she was half way done with it. She looked back at Bennett. “I was pregnant.” She ran a hand through her hair and put the plate down. “I wasn’t going to screw over your life and I was sure as well not going to have you reject me because of it. SO I left. Good choice too. Because honestly, I know you left to. Probably had to leave me back. Undercover work is that way.” She shrugged and crossed one leg over the other. Her blue eyes let some sadness leak out before shutting her emotion off. “That’s why I left. I needed to.” She shrugged her shoulders and took her fork for another bite.

BENNETT/HALEY, 1063 WORDS, ITS OKAY DOLL NO WORRIES

[bennett clauison]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,10,true][/style][atrb=style, width: 525px; border-bottom: 20px #241108 solid, bTable] TRYNA MAKE SENSE OF WHAT LITTLE REMAINS cause you left me with no love and honour to my name [style=height: 317px; width: 250px; margin-right: -520px; font-size: 8.5px; font-family: tahoma; text-align: justify; line-height: 1; text-transform: lowercase; overflow: auto; scrollbar-base-color:#DBBBA2; color: #000;]the room cleared out in an instant with the commissioner giving everything a solid look of disappointment but bennett did not miss his superior grabbing a piece of cake before exiting as well and he had to admit it was comical. his comic relief was over in an instant as he was left with nothing but the shadows of his past come to life and standing before him. she had grown up though and though he had been a legal adult at that time, his eighteen year old mind was raging with hormones but now, it was raging with lust. he had keep himself calm as he desired to just drop to the floor and let the dizzy feeling take over but he stayed strong. ”woah.”

[/b] he commented, stepping back as she took the knife into her head, ”I know we have our differences..”[/b], his hands going up in a mock surrender. it was all meant to be another comic relief as bennett would have been quick to pull out his own weapon if he honestly thought of himself to be in danger. the only thing that bennett was sure of in the danger department was that feelings were going to start bubbling up again and he knew that by a mere look to his ex-flame. he moved to the cake after her, needing to stuff his mouth with something other than his foot at his point and cake seemed like a good substitute. the knife sliced through the fluffy cake with ease and he tipped the piece onto a paper plate and took a forkful. he nodded in agreement to the comment about the choice of cake as his coworkers had certainly picked out a good flavor of cake and he was emersed in it for only a second before the heavy conversation began to follow suit with the heavy tension between them. obviously, it was this kind of loose end that needed to be tied and it was apparent that his birthday was the primetime to do it.

he had not meant to be so blunt and quick to jump the gun, he felt he should have asked her how she was though her appearance gave it away that she was doing well for herself. she always had a rustic beauty to her, classic in every way and it had always intrigued him but now it scared him. he had no idea what he was feeling at this moment in time but he dropped onto the chair across from her as his chair had become occupied, ”yea no go ahead, take a seat…”[/b], he mumbled, fumbling to get a piece of cake into his mouth due to his shaky demeanor. it was obvious that the male was shaken up, shocked by the ghost of his past but it was also becoming clear that he was calming down and gaining his professionalism back. ”we need capes and you need a new name.”[/b] he commented back, quick to reply to the sidekick comment and chuckled to himself, getting another forkful of cake in before he said anything else. bennett was a male, a good hearted man but he still had that moment of saying something inappropriate and though he wanted to, the moment was not calling for the comment on the tip of his tongue and the male swallowed the comment down with the cake. sighing softly, he placed the plate on the desk and looked over to her, shaking his head, ”….i had to. my assignment was over. you were never supposed to see me again but you were not supposed to leave the way you did. you never even said goodbye..”[/b]. his tone held pain, soft spoken and shaking his head in dismissal of the whole thing as bennett had told himself that he had gotten over the departure from his life but with her re-entrance, it was evident that there was still some remains of a broken heart.

her avoidance of eye contact was a little annoying as bennett wanted to see the truth that used to reflect in her eyes and even as he followed her gaze, their eyes never met. his jaw clenched with irritation but relaxed seconds later as he picked up his plate once more and started to take small bites of cake now that his peace had been said, ”it’s fine, forget the paperwork. bossman will too, he always does.”[/b] which is why bennett got away with missing deadlines and getting extensions. he used his own field work as an excuse or a lead and though it was a lie, it bought him more time of being in the action rather than behind the desk which he despised. the words slipped from her lips and the cake that he had been swallowing became lodged in his throat due to the gasp that came. he pounded his chest with his fist, forcing the pastry back down his throat and letting out a string of coughs. his mouth was opened but he felt no air reaching his lungs as he sat there, staring at her with a blank expression with no blinking involved. it was a state of shock that he had fallen into and the words needed a moment to process and once they had, his eyes fell to her stomach, ”..p-pregnant?...at…what!?”[/b] he finally rose from the desk. his feet began moving before his brain was processing what he was doing, pacing back and forth infront of her with his hand running through his hair and tugging at the ends of it. ”…it’s mine? dammit lani! why didn’t you tell me!? I have a kid and I don’t even know it!?”[/b], though he did have a kid that he knew about but who hardly knew about him. sighing, he moved closer to her, leaning against his desk and crossing his arms, ”does..he or she…need anything?..”[/b] he asked, stepping into the role of fatherhood once more and not even thinking to the idea of his hunter finding out about the ghosts of his pasts. he saw the tear and he shook his head quickly, ”no no…lani I wouldn’t have rejected you or him..her…never. I would have given up my position and followed you to the ends of the earth..”[/b] but the choice was made for him by her own departure and that caused an ache of pain in his chest.

”you didn’t need to. you didn’t even know that I was undercover…you didn’t know the truth but I would have told you. dammit! why did you have to be so stubborn?”[/b] he accused her, shaking his head once more and leaning into his desk more, feeling the edge of it digging into the skin of his back through the fabric of his uniform. he was so flustered and it read it on his face but when he turned his head to look at her, he saw the peekness of sadness and his mood changed instantly. he felt guilty for making her feel guilty but he did know that he wanted to be part of this child’s life and lani’s too, ”I did leave…”[/b] he mumbled, remembering the day that he had nearly tracked her down and then his boss had made a call to switch him out as bennett had gotten too emotionally involved, and it was all because of the girl sitting before him.
.[/div][/center][/td][/tr][/table][/center]

THIS POST IS THE WONDERFUL AND PATIENT LILY WITH HER CHARACTER, LOKELANI

[/COLOR]. THIS POST TURNED OUT TO BE 1231[/B] WORDS, WHICH IS NOT TOO BAD. MUSE METER IS FULL[/B] AND BENNETT IS WEARING HIS UNIFORM. THE ONLY THING TO BE SAID ABOUT THIS POST IS THE FEELINGS OF THIS THREAD..[/B][/div][/center]

[LOKELANI DARLING]

And through the rising and falling apart, We discover who we are

Lani gave him a look of “you don’t wanna play that gave.” But it wasn’t threatening, it was actually playful. The girl seemed to be actually relaxed, she didn’t needed to fake it at this point. She felt back to normal. The silence reminded her of how they used to be until they spoke of course, then it all disappeared. The brunette gave him a smile, half fake, the other sincere half trying to be hidden. “My cape’s going to be blue.” She nodded. She might as well help him cope with all of this. Truth be told she already researched Bennett Clauison weeks ago at her old job. She wanted to know who she was dealing with. She never thought about checking a picture of him. It was completely out of her head. But she was the one handling this better than the other. “Mmm.” She took a bite as she thought. “And my name would be Loki. Like the god.” She nodded taking another bite and shrugged one shoulder. “I’d be the badass one. And definitely not a sidekick.” She gave him a warning, almost daring him to refer to her as the side kick. Lani’s eyes rolled. “Yeah I know all about the assignments and protocols. Good thing too, you would have gotten a knee to your groin otherwise.” She showed no sign she was kidding. Actually she did think about different ways to somehow show it to him. But in the end, she was at fault as much as he was. It was a sad thing. And those things tend to happen. “Look, Bennett,” it still sounded completely weird. She wondered if she’d ever get used to it. She was as sure as hell exsisted not going to call him Kyle. That would be bad. Very bad. “If I went to say goodbye, I would have to explain myself and in that time, I wasn’t good at lying especially to you. Besides I’m sure you’d coop better with me leaving than me if I saw you leave. Hell, you should have seen me when I found out you disappeared too.” Just like with Bennett, everything was coming back to Lani. She never really moved on. How could she? Especially now? She already been through a husband and a few people in between him and her latest break up. She was stuck at a point when nothing stuck. Was it because she left him, now she was cursed to leave everyone else?

“Sorry bub. If you’re going to be my partner, you’re going to do your paperwork and on time.” She gave him a stern look. “I have a reputation to uphold. And it’s not going to be ruined by some hothead taking advantage of the boss and his tendencies.” College did a toll on her. She had straight a’s and no breaks. Everything was turned on in time and her tests had high marks. Everything needed to be perfect if she wanted to be an agent. She already knew being bi-polar would cause some problems. Everything else needed to be right. Especially at work. “We’re finishing all this tonight.” She stabbed her cake and took the last bite of it before pushing herself up and dumping it into the trash can. She turned at him and smirked at his expression. The girl crossed her arms and just let him go freak out. This time though a few tears did sneak their way out. She wipe them off. “Bennett, I didn’t make it through the first trimester.” She paused and looked up and at the ceiling. “So you’re off the hook.” She looked back down and at him. It was strange, all of this. “Come on, I was eighteen. I was freaking out, we were together for what a month? I was a love sick puppy already, I didn’t think you’d feel that strongly about me.” She swallowed the imaginary thing stuck in her throat. “I wish I knew that after the miscarriage. Probably would have helped with…” She trailed off. Yeah she was not going to mention what happened after that. First finding out he was long gone and then what she had left of him was gone too. The girl took a seat back down and held herself. She had made progress since then. No need in bringing it up, right? But she was more than positive that Bennett was going to question her trail off. She took a deep breath and kept her eyes in front of her and away from him. She was going to keep calm and controlled. Calm and controlled. She kept repeating it to herself, trying to make herself believe it. She bit her lip and glanced at him. She was feeling the same ach, but she wasn’t going to mention it. She actually didn’t know he was feeling it either.

She smirked. “Hey, that stubbornness got me a date with you, or well Kyle.” She shrugged her shoulders once more. It was a nervous twich sort of thing. “Even if you were a student and compared to your job here, I’d end up ruining you. Something I said I was going to avoid.” It was the truth. She was going to steal either life away. If he was a student, it would ruin his chances of moving on, trying to do better. Might even kill his chances of graduating, which he was apparently supposed to be working on. But instead he was undercover. He would have blown his cover and therefore his job. He would be done for. Reputation gone, known for getting attached and stuck to a desk for a very long time. She had seen it and it looked horrible. She nodded and tilted her head. “We both left because we had to.” It was obvious. His job to him away and her paranoia took her. Both weaknesses in their lives. “But I’m past that.” And that was a complete lie and Bennett would most likely, actually see right past it. The brunette moved the cake to the side and grabbed one of the files laying on the desk. “How many of these do you have piled up?” She picked up another looked at him annoyed, avoiding the whole little scenario they just have. “I am so going to need some coffee.” She muttered to herself picking up one of his pens. The girl looked up at him. “I think it’s a good thing Mister Bossman paired us up. You need to sort out your priorities or at least get on track for once.” Lani looked back down at the two files she took and opened one up. Something sparked in her head. She tapped her foot on the ground. Tomorrow she was going to dig up the case file from California. Her curiosity about what job he had in the past, what made him show up and drastically change her life forever. The girl picked up one sheet and looked underneath it before putting it back down. She kept looking over it, but honestly, nothing was going through her head. She glanced back up and sighed. “Sit your ass moving Clauison. You’re going to turn these in tomorrow morning. I’m making sure of it. And don’t try to get out of it. It’s not going to work.” She raised her eyebrows. It was like highschool again, trying to get him to do his classwork and then homework.

BENNETT/HALEY, 1241 WORDS, LANI IS FEELING HER OLD EMOTIONS ):

[bennett clauison]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,10,true][/style][atrb=style, width: 525px; border-bottom: 20px #241108 solid, bTable] TRYNA MAKE SENSE OF WHAT LITTLE REMAINS cause you left me with no love and honour to my name [style=height: 317px; width: 250px; margin-right: -520px; font-size: 8.5px; font-family: tahoma; text-align: justify; line-height: 1; text-transform: lowercase; overflow: auto; scrollbar-base-color:#DBBBA2; color: #000;]he caught her look and it caused his eyebrow to raise as he looked down to the knife in her hand and took another step back, playful in all the actions that he was doing—verbally and physically. he was playful by nature and that was something that even “kyle” had though bennett was forced to change a lot of his personality in order to fit back into his teenage years, it was not a hard role for him to fill as he was naturally, a teenager. he was rebellious and unorthodox, he was rude sometimes and had an attitude, he hated not to get his way and thought life was unfair in many ways—it was just like a teenager. ”red for me.”

[/b] as that was his favorite color and that had not changed, the small details of who he was were also relayed information to her but she knew him until his alias but the little things were still the same. bennett ran his hands through his hair when he was nervous, as did kyle, he often was sarcastic, a trait shared between the two aliases. he was the same guy, but his past was not the same and neither was his name or age. he had always been honest with lani to a certain degree but not to the point that she would know the major facts about his life and apparently, bennett was still learning the facts himself. ”norse g-d of mischief. makes complete sense there.”[/b], he mumbled as lani had always been a bit of a troublemaker and he was sure the piece of her that held that encoding was never going to falter. ”uh no way.”[/b] he chuckled, shaking his head as she assigned herself a role, ”not sidekick. hero support.”[/b], quoting a movie reference from a juvenile film that bennett had actually enjoyed, he let his eyes fall to the ground in defeat, letting out a small sigh and shaking his head, ”well then I would never ben able to have…kids..”[/b]. he was tempted to say another but that would be putting coral on the map and bennett was not about to do that, even to an ex-flame who held no relation to the killer that was hunting him.

”you wouldn’t have had to lie. the truth was owed to me at least, an explanation, anything instead of finding you not showing up for class and then finding the house to be empty and for sale. that’s not the mature or even the good way of leaving lani…”[/b], as he recalled asking around her friends who were silent about what they knew and finally, he just showed up at her empty house with the intention of scolding her for shutting him out after having put his walls down for her and allowed them to get closer but he found a surprise. the house had been empty and a sign had been pitched on their front lawn, heart broken and defeated, the male had trudged back to his apartment in hopes that she would be there but nothing, there was no trace of the girl anyway. he was not sure of how she was able to erase her trail so fast and he was disappointed that it took him so long to realize that she was gone but that was all meant to be in the past. ”hey I had to go. I had to leave lani, my assignment had gotten compromised..”[/b], yet again, ”I got…too emotionally involved in it.”[/b], quoting his old boss with air quotations to match. the word emotionally involved meant only one thing, bennet had broken a rule and had fallen in love and there was a slight chance, that he had never really fallen out of it either. he rolled his eyes, pushing the paperwork away from him in disgust, ”focus on the conversation please.”[/b] he grumbled, not wanting to focus on the papers on the desk or the mountain of paperwork that he had to file. ”you’ll live, my reputation is amazing and so will yours if you associate yourself with me.”[/b] because bennett was popular due to his social abilities, not because of his punctuality. ”fine, we will finish the stupid paperwork tonight, stop changing the subject..”[/b], he slammed his fist on the desk in annoyance, moving to pace once more.

he looked over to her as she departed from his chair, his eyes flitting from the chair to her and wondering if he could get his spot back before she could but he opted against it as she spoke. shaking his head, he looked to the floor, feeling the loss of his own hardly developed child hit him hard, ”shit.”[/b] he mumbled, reaching up to rub at his tear ridden eyes. he had never even known the lifeform and his eyes were watering for it, ”i’m sorry lani..”[/b] he spoke calmly but was unable to control the crack in his voice at the start of her name. his thumb and index finger pushed into his eyes, ”don’t say it like that. you make it seem like it would have been a burden..”[/b] which it wouldn’t have been. the product of their love would have been in that small baby and no matter their age, bennett was sure that they would have succeeded. ”I was…twenty three.”[/b], having figured that she would have figured out his age at this point because doing the math would have been easy, ”a month and seventeen days..”[/b]. he had kept track, counting down the days that it would take to screw up his assignment once he surrendered to her persistent ways and then on the seventeenth day, she was gone. ”we would have been fine…if you would have at least told me that I was going to be a dad!”[/b] and though he knew her words held some merit, he did not want to believe that his life would have been ruined. he would have been a father at an early age and possibly transferred to another department but even his own family would not be able to tear him away from the field work that he loved doing. ”…helped with what?”[/b] he asked with concern, taking a step closer to her and wanting to know everything that happened. he wanted to hear the ins and outs, the small cravings, the little signs of pregnancy that she had, but he could see the pain in her eyes and he quickly returned back to his desk with much restraint on his part.

he chuckled, nodding, ”yea..”[/b] as that had been true with the fact that the girl had pushed and pushed until he gave him, and then he never wanted to let her go. she opened his eyes to a world that bennett never thought was even possible for him and she had done it so easily but in truth, the relationship was built on lies that bennett saw as an illusion of truth. he wanted to believe that he was being honest with her through the entire, almost, two months, but he was wrong. ”no you wouldn’t have, you saved me lani…you …”[/b], his voice trailed off, knowing that talking about feelings were going to dig up buried ones. he was thankful for the subject change while looking down at his desk and shrugging, ”six I think.”[/b]. not having actually gone through them all and counting. it was a rough estimate but it seemed about right, ”they are briefs, like thirty minutes for each…”[/b] which seemed like a long time for the two of them to be stuck in a room together for. ”but I’ll make you a cup…I need mine irish style at this point.”[/b] he commented, having a load of stress due to the can of worms that had been opened between the two of them. ”it’s disorganized chaos,nothing wrong with that. I can find any file on this desk..”[/b], or what could be the desk as the piles of paperwork were covering the surface and leaving everything in a disarray of paperwork. ”chill darling.”[/b] always enjoying that her last name was also the same as a petname, ”it will be done before the end of the night. chill.”[/b] he repeated the word once more before pulling up a chair next to the girl and rolling his eyes while moving the mouse on the pad to kick start his computer. ”yea great idea bossman..”[/b] he muttered, glancing down from paper to the computer screen, typing in date after data until his eyes were red and sore and everything was sorted through,[/div][/center][/td][/tr][/table][/center]

THIS POST IS THE WONDERFUL AND PATIENT LILY WITH HER CHARACTER, LOKELANI

[/COLOR]. THIS POST TURNED OUT TO BE 1431[/B] WORDS, WHICH IS NOT TOO BAD. MUSE METER IS FULL[/B] AND BENNETT IS WEARING HIS UNIFORM. THE ONLY THING TO BE SAID ABOUT THIS POST IS THE FEELINGS OF THIS THREAD..[/B][/div][/center]