An Early Gift -- Kiernan

[kira]

Kira was exhausted. She always seemed so damned exhausted these days. Add into account the fact that she couldn't seem to stomach coffee any longer and there wasn't a whole lot she could do about it, save give in to her uncontrollable urges to lay down and sleep the damned day away. But she was stubborn. She'd always been stubborn and always would be. She fought her exhaustion until there was nothing left in her and then she just collapsed in a heap in bed. She was pretty sure Kiernan was going to start wondering if there wasn't something wrong with her. Hell, she had started wondering if there was something wrong with her a while ago.

But there was one thing she had set into motion that she was going to damned well see through to the end. She knew how difficult that it was for Kiernan to get to see his son at all, let alone over the holidays. So after she'd done some tracking down and whole hell of a lot of convincing and coaxing, she'd finally arranged his Christmas present for him, even if she was pretty sure that the last thing on his mind with her untimely disappearance would ahve been Christmas presents. She'd left the compound a few days ago with nothing more than two 24 cases of beer in the fridge and a note beside them that said 'Dasvidanya'. Russian for 'Goodbye'. Perhaps it was a little cruel of her, but in the end, she figured it was the most likely outcome of him not coming and looking for her.

She didn't need him digging in to this particular endeavor as far as things went for the simple fact that she didn't want him getting into trouble or getting hurt. But when she got back, it would all be worth it.

Ireland had been cold and wet, just as he had promised it would be, but unlike the weather that had come with the hurricane that had battered them only a short while ago, it had had a sort of calming beauty to it as well. She liked it, she decided. Even if she would have liked to have seen the sun out while she'd been there. Kiernan's son had been incredible. Such a brilliant and adorable little boy that had made her miss her niece and nephew fiercely. He'd been vibrant and full of life and held the same quick wit that she knew his father had. Kira had been surprised by his mother. She had seemed skeptical at first, but in the end, had wound up actually liking the fact that Kiernan had seemingly found someone else in his life. Kira wasn't about to correct her upon the place that she had in Kiernan's life for the simple fact that she wasn't sure what that place was any more.

And then came a whack of other news that Kiernan would probably wind up wanting to throttle her for keeping from him at the moment, but she knew that this would be a big enough blow for him once he saw what she had done. He had to deal with one thing at a time. But as she glanced down at her stomach and the not-yet visible bump beneath her coat, she couldn't help but wonder if he'd be happy over the prospect of her being pregnant, or upset with it. Either way, she was willing to wait to find his reaction out until Christmas. And it was funny how she'd found out to begin with. It had been Kiernan's own mother that had zoned in on the symptoms without ever really even knowing her. Interesting all in itself, but she supposed that a woman who had been around for the birth of Kiernan's first son as well as the birth of her own children would know something along those lines. The moment Kira had gotten back to the USA, she'd taken a pregnancy test in her motel room. It had come back positive... So had the three different ones she'd taken after the fact. And with only a week and a half until Christmas, she needed all the time she could muster to find the courage to tell him...

She finally drove her beat up Ford back into the compound again, parking it in front of Kiernan's place. His ATV and truck were both there, so she knew that he was home. She headed on inside and paused in the doorway before heading for the area where he did all of his paper work. And sure enough, there he was. She bit down on her lip as she looked at him. "Hey." She offered with a small smile. "Long time, no see." Even if it had only been a few days, honestly, it felt like it had been ages for her. "How pissed are you at me?"

[KIERNAN O'FARRELL]

Kiernan had noticed that Kira didn’t seem quiet herself lately with her aversion to coffee which she hadn’t had a problem with at first or seeming tired more often. He’d thought maybe she was coming down with a cold but hadn’t really been sure it was his right to order suggest she go to the doctors to get checked. He wasn’t one of those guys who’d treat her like she had the plague if she got sick but he’d rather know if she was sick or not since she had become someone he worried about and even cared about. He had been wracking his brain for ideas for Christmas presents for her since the holiday was coming up and she’d mentioned already knowing what she would get him. He was screwed in that aspect because he’d never been a good present buyer, Morrigan told him what stuff Bren would like or that he needed and he’d go off that to pick things normally since he just didn’t know what to buy for people if it wasn’t something clear.

He’d been thinking more about it and tempted to call Nick up and get the man’s opinion on a few of his ideas or just to ask for ideas at all but he wasn’t quite that desperate yet. He would do what he could to avoid that man teasing his ass for “overthinking” it or something like that. He’d not planned on her disappearing though, hadn’t even seen that coming till she hadn’t been there but there was a ton of beer and the message with one of the few Russian words he did know. If that hadn’t been a kick in the balls he didn’t know what else would be since a woman didn’t leave you a message like that if she wasn’t going of her own choice. He’d done a little poking after that to try to figure it out but without digging he wouldn’t find anything and he knew it. Checking in on the Russian thing and calling in a favor or two he found out what the Russians that were hunting her were up to in the basics but there wasn’t anything heading this direction either from that front right now so she wouldn’t have just picked up and taken off because of a threat or something if they weren’t even looking this direction.

Letting it go as her just deciding to just not poke at it since she’d never told him she would stay for good and that they hadn’t made any of those types of promises to each other he didn’t dig though it was tempting. He considered the option that Nick might have sent her somewhere since she was one of his operatives but he kinda figured something like that she’d mention to him that she wouldn’t be around for a bit or Nick would have mentioned even. No word on either front and he just let it go to stick his balls on ice and nurse that wound. He had no right to expect her to stick around, no right to feel upset when she was gone because he wasn’t sure what exactly they were in truth other than two people who enjoyed being around each other and fucking or talking and trusting…well hell that sounded a lot like something it clearly wasn’t.

Throwing himself into work and sorting out the camp for some of the more challenging winter activities he pulled long days working, longer nights staring at paperwork he was supposed to be working on and ended up learning the most comfortable way to prop his feet on his desk to sleep. He was just a busy guy, he didn’t have any issues with his bed or thinking about shit. A beer or four a night and some time relaxing in one hell of a comfortable chair in his office area wasn’t anything he wouldn’t have done before she waltzed into his camp and life. He’d done all of those things before her just less frequently but he’d had to get all this stuff done lately so it happened more often these days. Things would settle and he’d get back to normal patterns soon.

Sitting at his desk glaring at an order form that had gotten fucked to hell he shook his head trying to figure out who’s end the errors had come from and who’s ass he should be kicking he sighed. Making a note to have someone call and at least get the order fixed the next day so they didn’t get a ton of shit they didn’t need. Seriously how many bandages did they need? They weren’t fighting in the middle of a war. Yeah it could be dangerous but if it was as dangerous as this order implied he needed to put every last person here and who came here regularly back through the safety course…three times. Hearing someone coming in he had to wonder what person was stupid enough to just wander into his place and pulled a gun from his desk drawer not moving from his seat and keeping his eyes on the paper as he waited until the person came to a stop where he could see her. Sighing and putting the gun back in its place after making sure the safety was on and looking up at her lifting an eyebrow. ”Has been…hadn’t been sure the see would ever happen again… he said leaning back in his chair and letting his eyes roam over her taking in how she looked and totally not checking she was okay. ”I’m not pissed. Maybe a little confused but not pissed.” he said honestly thinking that pissed was for when you were sure someone was supposed to be there then they weren’t not confusing relationships where you weren’t sure what was what either way. ”You back or just came to get your beer? Cause there’s not a whole lot left.”

MEL/KIRA :: DONE

[kira]

Kira took note of the fact that he'd gone and pulled a gun. It was one of the things she loved about him. He was so damned willing to protect what was his. He had to wonder for a moment if the woman who had mothered Kiernan's son even realized what she was missing out on. And just as quickly as that thought came, she slammed it shut behind an iron door and locked it up tight. Woah there. She couldn't go thinking like that just yet. One step at a time. For one, she had to see how he'd wind up reacting to all of the news that she had to give him... Both of his apparent Christmas presents. But she was thankful that he seemed okay, all things considered, even if there was a mess of beer bottles in the Kitchen that told her more than enough about what his state of mind had been like while she'd been gone.

She didn't miss the way he looked over her in the moment and had to give him a knowing smile to let him know that he couldn't hide from her. Not like that. "Well... I'm back." She said as she inched a little closer. She didn't give him an explanation on that front. She understood easily enough how and why he would be confused. They'd been on a good note when she'd left. It wasn't like they'd been fighting or arguing a load. "Not pissed...." She said, looking at him speculatively. "Any other lingering emotions I should be made aware of? Because I know I felt... alone... While I was gone." She said, looking at him. She was being honest with him in the moment. She'd felt dreadfully alone, but she had known that he would appreciate what she was doing, once he finally figured it all out.

She smiled a little and shook her head when he asked if she had come back to get her beer. "Oh I'm back. I never really left. I just went on a brief vacation of sorts..." She said. She chewed her lip a moment. "You remember how I told you that you were going to get your christmas present early?" She asked him, tiling her head to the side. "Well... here's a part of it." She said as she pulled a large envelope out from behind her and put it on the table in front of him. She looked at him expectantly, just waiting for him to open it and see what was inside. She had a feeling that she was about to see a side of the man in front of her that he had never seen before.

Inside the envelope were a bunch of photographs... updated photographs of his son and his sister and mother, all smiling for the camera. There was one in there of his son opening a Christmas present that she had picked out for the little guy and given him in Kiernan's honor. There was another picture of her with Kiernan - one that his mother had insisted on her snapping and bringing back with her. There was a DVD in there - a video that his mother and sister and son had recorded for him before she'd left. And then, there was a christmas card printed in the hand writing of a six year old.

She perched herself on the edge of his desk and didn't comment until he'd sifted through the contents of the envelope. "I think... maybe... She might be a little more receptive to the idea of him coming to visit in the future... Don't hold me to that but... Maybe."

[KIERNAN O'FARRELL]

Kiernan hadn’t pulled a gun as often when she’d been in the house, used to her being there and listening for her particular footsteps he’d known the signs so he’d known he didn’t need it when he could tell it was her. That was a whole other level of trust he hadn’t even thought about really because it just happened even without him needing to decide on it being that way. He’d trusted that he didn’t need to defend himself against her coming into his place because she belonged there too for awhile. Without her there though the place had felt more empty and just…weird he could admit. How she’d become part of it so fast when he normally didn’t let anyone in at all he didn’t understand but had decided before not to question until he had to. He didn’t know where she’d gone or why, didn’t know if she’d just be disappearing again with a message of beer and “goodbye” or with no message at all actually since she didn’t owe him anything like that anyway right?

Looking at her now he caught the look she gave him when she caught him checking her over and lifted an eyebrow in answer to her unspoken comment there before nodding to her as she said she was back. ”Does seem you are less I drank more than I thought and my head’s decided it wants to fuck with me for it.” he said knowing exactly how much he’d drank and that it wasn’t a case of him being that drunk right now. Watching as she came closer he didn’t move from his spot and considered her question about the other lingering emotions she should know about trying to figure them out before nodding, ”Alone’s a good one…confused, alone, disappointed, worried…there were a few emotions that might linger but with you standing here now mostly confusion.” he admitted with a shrug and picked up the beer off the desk taking a sip and setting it back in its spot.

Listening as she said she was back though she’d never “really” been gone he lifted an eyebrow at her waiting for more explanation and nodding when she mentioned an early Christmas present. ”I remember you mentioning that yes.” he said and looked at the envelope confused about what that was but reaching out to pick it up as he sat up in the chair. He didn’t bother asking if he should open it right then since she had said early before Christmas present and wouldn’t be giving it to him now if he was supposed to wait.

Seeing what was inside though made him freeze a moment at the familiar faces on the pictures inside, pulling them out carefully once he had gotten his brain back to working order after a few seconds. Looking through the pictures of his son, sister, mother, and Kira herself he could feel the lump forming in his throat a tight ball of the emotions choking him at the moment. He didn’t speak as he looked through them, unable to speak right now to be honest and he looked at the DVD tempted to put it in that second and watch it until his eyes fell on the card in what was clearly his son’s writing. Rubbing the back of his hand over his mouth he didn’t give two shits how unmanly it made him to feel tears stinging his eyes at that moment because she’d just given him the best Christmas present he’d ever gotten. ”This…” his voice cut off on him that tight lump in his throat still there as he glanced from the card to the pictures then back at it before looking up at her. ”Thank you.” he said not even able to think of the right words to explain how very much this meant to her and hoping she could tell somehow. ”This is…I can’t even…Thank you…” he said looking back at everything and rubbing a hand over his face wiping at the few tears that had slipped and fallen and just totally amazed at what she’d done for him.

MEL/KIRA :: DONE

[kira]

Kira knew that they had a strange thing working for them. They put a lot of trust in one another and she was okay with that, strangely enough. After having locked herself up so much so that she didn't think she'd ever trust another person again, she had to admit that it was nice to be able to understand that there was someone out there who had her back. While she knew that Nick and the rest of the guys would kick ass, she always felt like a bit of an outsider. She supposed it was because she was the new girl there and she hadn't put in as much time as the others. Likewise, she hadn't spent nearly as much time with them as she had spent with Kiernan over the last little while. She'd gotten to know him better than she knew herself, she thought sometimes. Even if she didn't know all of the details of his past, she knew enough of the man that he had become.

She gave a small laugh at his comment about drinking more than he thought. "I thought Irishmen could never drink too much or 'more than I thought'." She said, bringing her fingers up into air quotes as she smirked at him a little. She was trying to gauge his mood at the moment. She was trying to figure out how to breach the subject that she wanted to, but she knew there was no simple answer and there sure as hell was no easy way at the moment. She was actually surprised for a moment when he admitted to the emotions that he'd been feeling while she'd been gone, but her surprise quickly turned into a smile. "See? I knew you cared about me." She teased him gently, even as she picked up the beer bottle and moved it far out of reach for the time being. She was being flirty and playful at the moment because she didn't know what else to do with herself.

She watched him, chewing on her lower lip, as he picked up the envelope. She wondered what his reaction would be, but she knew it wouldn't be long before he finally gave it. He froze for a moment and Kira had to wonder if she'd done wrong in going there... If somehow this had pissed him off. She swallowed, her eyes flickering from the envelope to his face and back again as she tried to get some kind of a reading on him in the moment. But then she watched him as the tears filled his eyes and a pang of sadness for him and everything he had endured went flooding through her. How the hell was she supposed to deny that she felt anything for this man after this?

He was trying to find the words to thank her and she knew it well enough. She smiled at him a moment later, however, and dropped down onto her knees in front of him, placing a hand on his cheek. "I only wish that I could have made it possible for you to see him in person, Kier." She told him. "But you should know that he's healthy and he's happy. He understands who you are now and ow his family is different from others." She shook her head. "It won't stop him from calling the other man 'father' obviously but... it's a start, yeah?" She asked him gently. "He's a good boy." She told him with a nod and another smile. Jesus... She was being all soft again. These pregnancy hormones... Yes... That was what she was going to blame it all on. "Go ahead... Watch it..." She said, nudging the DVD towards him. "I'm going to go grab a shower and give you a little privacy, hmm? And then, once I'm done we'll talk." She shrugged a shoulder before turning and heading up the stairs and back to the old room she had kept.

[KIERNAN O'FARRELL]

Kiernan wasn’t against forming the trust with Kira or being used to her being around, he didn’t have a problem with it but it had taken him by surprise at first that it had come so easily. Maybe they’d had a sense of kindred spirit or whatever it was that pulled two people into trusting or understanding each other and hadn’t realized it until too late. Either way though it had happened then she’d taken off and left him really confused though a little wondering if she’d been freaked out by what they’d settled into between them. Admittedly neither of them were going around spouting “I love you” or getting into that area but they had been getting close and he knew that for him feelings had been there whether he admitted it or not. Her taking off could have been because that freaked her out but he didn’t think she was the sort to let anything freak her out. He’d been plenty wrong about things before though so he wouldn’t bet his life on that.

When she laughed and pointed out that Irishmen couldn’t drink “too much” or more than they thought he shrugged and couldn’t help a small chuckle at that. ”We also conveniently forget things when it suits us…such as the fact that we can’t drink too much or more than we think.” he said simply and smirked. It was true enough, he’d seen many a man conveniently forget something or other when it suited them and he’d been the man to remind them a few times too when they needed it. He wasn’t really that man here though, he’d morphed into a different man who didn’t kill for cash and didn’t remind people of past misdeeds anymore. It was a different life and different circumstances here and he was still unsure he was doing it right to be honest.

When she commented on his caring about her he lifted an eyebrow at that and nodded with a little smile before shaking his head, ”Guess that did happen…cause yeah I do.” he admitted thinking about how he’d worried at first that the Russians had gotten to her and then the way he’d felt when he realized she was most likely just gone for her own reasons. Caring wasn’t something he couldn’t do or couldn’t handle, he cared about his son and family but it was a different kind of caring and one he wasn’t sure he should be feeling at this point but couldn’t help either. Somehow the Russian woman had joined his list of those he would protect and take care of, those he wanted to be happy and safe.

Looking at what she’d brought back to him he was struck deep by the things she’d brought back to him. He didn’t get to see his son, didn’t get that many pictures either and contact with him was hard because of the issues with Morrigan fearing what would come of it should someone who didn’t like Kiernan found out how important his son was to him. He could understand her fears and worries but it hurt more than he’d ever put into words. Kira had gone to Ireland, had gone and gotten these pictures and this card from his son. The DVD he hadn’t yet watched but knew would just be even more precious to him when he did. He didn’t have any way to thank her for this, there was no words or gifts, gestures or anything that could explain how much this meant to him.

Looking at her as she knelt in front of him he didn’t realize he’d lent into her touch on his cheek as he listened to her speak still at a loss for words himself. He knew that seeing Bren in person was a complicated situation, he’d accepted that a long time ago so he didn’t fault her for not being able to make that happen. She’d done the best thing though and he was so thankful for it. ”Yeah…I’ts a start. Thank you Kira…I can’t ever say that enough.” he said his voice a little rough with emotion right now as he spoke. He nodded to her saying Bren was a good boy, that much he knew and had seen for himself the last time he’d gotten to see his son but it was good hearing someone say it. Looking at the DVD when she nudged it toward him and told him to watch it he nodded a little and kissed her cheek as she moved to get up before watching her go up the stairs. Still stunned but a little desperate to see what the DVD would hold he picked it up and moved to the DVD player in the living room putting it in and hitting play landing heavily on the couch as he watched the screen light up with familiar faces of people he missed. Watching it through he rubbed at his face to wipe away more tears when they fell the remote dangling in his other hand as he considered watching it again or going and giving the woman who’d done this for him a hug.

MEL/KIRA :: DONE

[kira]

She laughed a little at what he said about 'forgetting'. "I don't think that's just an Irishman thing. I think that's a male thing in general. But there's a problem." She commented. "A man as seriously badass as you doesn't just 'forget' things. And a woman as smart as I am knows that. So you're screwed. Don't bother trying to lie to me." She smirked at him in the moment. She missed him. She damned well had to admit it to herself. She'd missed him way too damned much for her own sense of sanity. She'd missed the easy way that the pair of them joked and she just missed having him around her in general. She knew it all enough now to know that she didn't want to leave for any extended amount of time at the moment. Christ, the more she went along with this, the more it was sounding like a permanent arrangement to her.

She smiled a bit when he admitted to the fact that he did care about her. Christ... there was that warm fuzzy feeling in her chest that she usually only ever got when she thought of her niece and nephew. Lord help her. This was starting to become frightening. It never ceased to amaze her how people like them often had the hardest times with the things that most people just took for granted. Having a significant other... learning to trust someone... caring about someone. It all came naturally for most people, but for the pair of them, it was something that they had to train themselves to do all over again because that part of them had been ripped away by events in their lives that made it near impossible t do those things without fearing for it. But seeing as he'd gone and thrown himself under the bus... "Good. Because I'm willing to admit the same thing. I wouldn't have gone through all this trouble if it wasn't the case." She murmured.

And it was true. She'd done a hell of a lot of digging and researching in order to pull this off without Kiernan being any the wiser. Honestly, it was a testament to her skills in the fact that she was able to access the information she needed without leaving a trail behind her. But that wasn't what this was about. It wasn't about proving herself on some level. It was about doing something for Kiernan that she knew no one else had ever bothered to do for him because of the supposed reputation that he had. To hell with that. Kira had never been the type to make an opinion on someone based upon what she had heard from others. She'd made her own opinion of the man based on everything that she had seen from him. And him crying over the fact that she had given him a gift that she knew he'd appreciate...? Well that just put a whole other layer of depth to the man that she hadn't anticipated.

She smiled a little when he thanked her again and nodded. "You're welcome." She murmured before gently pulling away and letting him know that she was headed for the shower while he watched the DVD. While she did need the chance to reflect and unwind after the trip she'd taken, she also wanted to give him the time he needed to watch the DVD and enjoy the contents of it. They were precious moments captured that she had a feeling that he'd be watching until he could next see his son again. Yes, she could understand why his son's mother had was so cautious and careful where Kiernan and his son were concerned and yet, at the same time, she wished that it wasn't the case. No little boy was loved more than Kiernan's son was by his own father and she knew that now.

Her hand absently went to her stomach as she thought of all of this as she stepped out of the shower and looked at herself in the reflection in the mirror. She sincerely hoped that Kiernan would have the chance to love their child, if he so wanted. But she had to wonder if he wouldn't freak out over the possibility that she would up and leave him, with their baby, at some point in the future because she was frightened too. But the fact of the matter was... Kira had never felt more safe or secure or trusted with another human being in the world.

[KIERNAN O'FARRELL]

Kier couldn’t help a small smile as she laughed at his words about forgetting, glad she was amused by that at least. He was glad she was back to laugh at his bad jokes, glad she was back in truth because something about her being there just…god help him it seemed right. He shook his head at himself and turned it into a headshake at her words when he realized it was weird to be shaking his head at himself. ”A man seriously badass as me knows when to not play with a kind of fire…so no I won’t bother trying to lie to you anymore.” he said with a chuckle. ”At least not about the stuff that matters. Things like “did you drink the last beer?” will be answered with a lie since admitting to drinking the last and not restocking is enough of a reason to be punched or randomly sent to the store at any hour.” he said not sure why he’d even bothered going there but sticking by it now that it was said since it was also true. He’d go get more beer though if she asked and that in itself was a weird idea since his normal answer was “go get it yourself” to anyone else.

He knew admitting to caring about her was risky, since it was a way of saying this had become more than just a sex thing to him. It had started as a sex thing and they both knew that but it had developed into more whether they were trying for that to happen or not. He wanted Kira to be safe, he wanted to make sure she was safe himself not trust someone else to make sure of it. That surely implied something more than “we’re fucking for the fun of it. They’d talked about it a little before, addressed the whole not liking the thought of being alone after the time they’d ended up arguing thing. To him it seemed that those feelings of not wanting to be alone anymore were growing the longer they were around each other and it seemed she was feeling the same way as well which was good since getting into that territory alone seemed dangerous. He nodded as she said she was willing to admit the same thing, ”Well at least we’re on the same page instead of flipping through different books.” he said thoughtfully.

He wouldn’t question how she’d found out everything she needed to know to go about getting these pictures and things. He couldn’t let himself think along the lines of “if she can find this who else could?” since that wasn’t the point of this present at all. He would address that information later and deal with it when he wasn’t wrapped up in the emotions that came with getting a present like this. He took the time while she was in the shower to watch the DVD and deal with the emotions filling him up right now. Normally he wasn’t the guy who got over-emotional, she was one of 3 people who’d ever seen him cry in his life that he knew of and he couldn’t find it in himself to mind that she had because in this case it wasn’t a bad thing it was just…unstoppable when faced with this kind of gift. She might not have been able to bring him over for a visit but she’d still given him his son for Christmas through pictures and the dvd and that meant everything to him whether she realized it or not.

Pushing up off the couch he wiped at his face again as he moved to the envelope and things, tucking them all safely away where they couldn’t be lost and wouldn’t be ruined. Not wanting to risk anything happening to them he moved up to his bedroom tucking them into the safe under the bed so they would be safe and where he’d always know they’d be when he wanted them to look at. Getting up from the floor he considered a moment before deciding to just interrupt her shower and made his way over there not hearing the water anymore and rapping his knuckles against the door before pushing it open and stepping inside to wrap his arms around her. ”That was the most amazing present Kira. Thank you very much for going to the trouble to get the pictures and the dvd and card and things. I can’t put into words what it means to me.” he said honestly feeling the need to try putting words to it all. He wouldn’t gush anymore over it, wouldn’t keep repeating himself but he’d told her now and that was what mattered.

MEL/KIRA :: DONE

[kira]

"Good boy." She smiled when he said that he wasn't going to try and lie to her again. Maybe she was a little patronizing at the moment, but she had to give him credit where it was due. He didn't even try to deny the fact that he'd been lying to her right then and there and the thought amused her to a degree. God, she'd missed this. She'd missed him and she damned well knew it. She just wasn't sure she was ready to say those words out loud quite yet. She wanted to get through giving him his present before she started contemplating feelings and things of the sort. One step at a time. "You're a wise man, Kiernan. You drink the last beer and you're going to be in a boatload of trouble. Especially after the crap you gave me for almost drinking all the beer." She pointed out.

Not that she'd be drinking beer for a good long while. She couldn't help but reflect on that fact a little bit as she stood there. She bit down on her lower lip absently. She had to wonder if he'd realize the fact that she wasn't drinking a drop of alcohol. Or that she wasn't even going to attempt being in the damned house when he brewed up some coffee. She'd finally figured out what the hell it was that had turned her off of the smell of it at the very least. That was one less screwed up mystery that she had to worry about. But she had to admit... not having her coffee in the morning... well... that was going to start sucking pretty damned quickly. In fact... It already did suck.

Kira knew that they were stepping things up to a degree here. It made her nervous, knowing what she was trusting him with, but then... he already knew her secrets. He already knew where she had come from, some of the things she had done in the past and the baggage that she came along with. He already knew that she was a hunted woman and that that wasn't going to change unless the Russian's realized that she was untouchable. Of course, for that to happen, they were going to have to make an attempt at touching her again. Christ, that thought scared the hell out of her when she considered the small bit of life growing inside of her now. What the hell would she do if they came for her when she was heavily pregnant and wouldn't be able to defend herself adequately enough? She knew she could depend on Kiernan, provided he didn't freak the fuck out over the fact that she was pregnant to begin with. Christ, she felt ill thinking about all fo this.

Kira was startled by the sound of him knocking at the door. She realized, as he opened it, that she had been standing there with a hand pressed to her stomach as she considered the baby. She dropped her hand immediately and had a moment of panic where she wondered if he had seen it at all. She was worried about telling him now, but she knew damned well that she'd go ahead as planned. She'd never been a coward before in her life and she sure as hell wasn't about to start now. He wrapped his arms around her, obviously not caring about the fact that she was wet or the state of undress she was in. She leaned her head back against his shoulder and smiled at him in the mirror in front of them.

Finally, she turned in his arms and smiled up at him, placing her palm against his chest as she looked up at him. "I know what it means to you. And that's exactly why I did it, Kiernan. You shouldn't have to be away from him at all... but knowing that he and you both go through the holidays separated..." She shook her head. "I know how much it hurts being away from Sergei and his family right now... And I figured it was about damned time that once... just once, someone cut you some slack and did something nice for you." She leaned in and kissed him gently before pulling back again. "But you do realize that me being back means that you're regulated to no coffee mornings again, huh?" She smirked a little.

[KIERNAN O'FARRELL]

Kiernan couldn’t help but lift an eyebrow and give her a look that clearly said “seriously” when she gave him the “good boy” since he wasn’t some pup that needed praising. It didn’t really piss him off or annoy him so much though, he could take a little of her being patronizing since he knew she knew the kind of man he was. She knew enough that it made her words more a joke than an insult to him and he didn’t say a thing about that as he sipped his beer not taking his eyes off of her. He did have to chuckle at her when she brought up the crap he’d given when she almost drank his last beer and shrugged. ”I’m irish, we take our beer seriously.” he joked and shook his head knowing that excuse was over-used but never a lie because of how very true it was. He wouldn’t actually flip out at her if she drank the last…but she would be sent to get more to replace it since person who down’s the last restocks, general rule really right?

He had drank his fair share of beer lately, but he didn’t see anything too unusual in it since he always drank beer, so he had more of a taste for it now, that wasn’t a big deal. He didn’t think anything of her not drinking right now, she’d just gotten back and before she’d left he hadn’t noticed much other than her dislike of coffee which she didn’t seem to have before recently. He actually hoped she was feeling better now since she’d seemed a bit under the weather before disappearing with the queasy stomach with the coffee and being tired. He figured it was one of those seasonal colds that everyone seemed to get now and then and that she’d either end up seeing a doctor for it or just toughing it out until it passed back out of her system. He needed his coffee in the morning so he hoped it would be something that was getting better by now or he’d end up killing his office staff some morning when they tried talking to him before he got his coffee and that was just messy. You had to make an excuse why they weren’t around anymore and you had to find somewhere to bury the bodies that didn’t connect to you and just a bunch of other crap.

Realizing that even considering what all it involved was a dangerous path to be going down since then it was planned out and that made it too tempting he didn’t think anymore on it as he focused on the amazing gifts she’d given him. The pictures and card, the dvd, the fact that she’d gone to Ireland to find his family and get these things. He was back to wondering about the whole “just sex” thing since that was definitely deeper than just sex. This meant more than just wanting to have someone warm laying next to you in bed and some really really fantastic sex before that laying next to in bed thing. This showed a level of caring that went past “well I’m used to you being there now so I don’t want to be alone cause then I’d be cold” or whatever. Then again he could be reading too much into it but he didn’t think so since she understood him and how it would mean so much to him.

His choice to go find her wasn’t the manliest for it’s reasons in being so he could give her a hug but he just didn’t give a fuck right now about “manly” verses not. He was polite enough to knock but he’d seen all he would see before and went in anyway. He hadn’t noticed her hand on her stomach, hadn’t been looking for anything like that so he’d just wrapped his arms around her to hug her close. Taking a moment just to enjoy the simple act of hugging someone he looked at them in the mirror and smiled back at her and their reflections. It was a little odd seeing the pair of them, not because she was naked and wet with him fully clothed but because it was a little like looking into a picture, one where they looked like a couple. He looked away from it though as she turned in his arms and focused on her and what she was saying considering the present he’d settled on and already put to play before she’d left he didn’t think this moment was the time to mention it.

”Holidays are something I ignore every year because thinking about them just fucking sucks when I know I’m spending them alone without any connection to my son or family. This year? I have that connection thanks to you…and you’re here so the holiday won’t suck so bad.” he said slipping her being there in just to see how she’d react to that truth. Her comment about the coffee had him groaning softly then chuckling, ”I can deal with that as long as you avoid my office because that is where I will be brewing it since I can’t do it here in the house…and I’m not giving it up entirely unless you want me killing people.” he explained to her and frowned. ”Are you sick? Or is this just one of those things you didn’t notice before?” he asked curiously wondering what was up with her and the sudden dislike of coffee smell.

MEL/KIRA :: DONE

[kira]

She just smiled at the expression he gave when she called him a good boy. She knew how to push his buttons sometimes, but she was pretty sure that he didn't mind nearly half as much as he pretended to care when it came to the things that he let her get away with. Even when he got all aggravated with her when she called him those cute names that he hated so much, she knew she was getting away with a hell of a lot where other people likely would have been in a whole shitload of trouble where he was concerned. She laughed at what he said about being Irish and loving his beer. "Are you ever going to not use that excuse?" She asked him, arching a brow.

Kira didn't let herself think too much about what was happening between the pair of them. It was happening and there wasn't a whole hell of a lot she wanted to do to stop it to be honest. It was nice not being alone for once and she knew that it was growing into something more than simply 'not being alone'. She wouldn't have gone through the efforts of doing what she had done for him if that would have been the case. She knew that, but she didn't want to think about it or try and figure out what the hell it meant for her. It was less complicated if she wound up doing that. But at the end of the day, she understood one basic fact.

She cared about Kiernan O'Farrell.

She had to smile a little when he said that she had made the connection to his son for him this year. She couldn't help but think that she'd at least been able to do a little good where that was all concerned. She was learning for the first time how much it sucked to be away from your family. And to think that this man had been doing it for a number of years already? Well that hadn't sat well with her at all to contemplate. He deserved better than that because she knew, despite what the world thought of him and what he tried to put forth for the world to see, he was a damned good man. An exceptionally good one at that.

She had to smile a little bit with what he said about her avoiding his office. "I'm pretty sure I can do that." Shit. They were compromising... almost as if they were a couple here. It was confusing and yet, somehow, it was thrilling all at the same time. The image of the pair of them that she'd had in the mirror only seconds ago struck a new chord with her. This was unchartered territory and she knew it. The thought of it all should have terrified her but... strangely... it didn't. He was familiar to her in a way that she didn't think anyone would ever be familiar to her. She had to admit that it was a comforting thought rather than terrifying. She shrugged a shoulder, however, when he asked if she was sick. "I'm not entirely sure. It might be a bug..." She said rather evasively. "If it doesn't go away in a while I'll go and see a doctor or something." She said, waving it off for the time being. Perhaps it would buy her a little time...

[KIERNAN O'FARRELL]

Kiernan let Kira get away with more than he’d ever really let anyone get away with before, that in itself was a strange thing but the way he was actually amused instead of annoyed most times was even more strange. She could call him the pet names and he’d catch himself chuckling and shaking his head if he was alone instead of fuming and wanting to rid her of any of those nicknames physically. She could drink the last beer and he’d go get more if she didn’t want to but wanted more…he knew how it would seem to anyone who knew him, but he didn’t face it fully himself because that just wasn’t a path he was going to be stepping down right now. Her question earned a chuckle as he shook his head in answer, ”No…Never going to not use that one.” he said with a cocky smirk. He was Irish, he could use that excuse all he wanted and get away with it.

He was comfortable in acknowledging that he liked having her around, liked not being alone and having her in his bed even when they weren’t going at it like “Rabbits” as Nick kept saying. It was nice to feel connected to someone for a change and nice to have someone around he didn’t have to hide his more violent/suspicious/paranoid tendencies from because she understood. Other women wouldn’t get it, he would make them nervous or scare them with the little things like how hearing someone in his house would lead to his first reaction being to grab a gun and stop breathing to listen where they were going and avoid being detected himself. Plus they’d probably annoy him with things like desires to shop and watch chick-flicks all the time or something. Kira was just as happy blowing shit up as he was and that made her amazing just off that fact alone.

He wanted her to feel safe at the camp with him, liked to hear it when she said “home” meaning his place…he cared and that was something he hadn’t done in awhile. He normally tried keeping himself closed off to avoid getting too close to someone who wouldn’t last, or someone who’d fuck him over like the last woman had done. Morrigan would be enough to make any man wary of other women after being with her, not because she was a bad person he couldn’t say that since he had fallen in love with her but because when you scared her or did something that sent her running she didn’t just take your heart she took everything she could grab it seemed. Then when the dust settled she still didn’t want you to have any part in what was yours so you had to fight tooth-and-nail to get what little bits you could.

Stopping his thoughts from going any farther down that path to avoid ending up going out to shoot something he looked at Kira and nodded as she agreed to avoiding his office so he could have his coffee there. It was strange to talk like this, sit here and make plans like her avoiding his office because he was willingly changing his morning habits so he wouldn’t make her sick with the coffee he needed to get going. Making that compromise instead of just saying “deal with it” to her or something wasn’t normal but it was right. Here with her and as they were even if he wasn’t thinking about that it was right. Nodding as she shrugged and said it was probably a bug but she’d go see a doctor if needed he was alright with that answer because he didn’t want her to be sick and trusted her to know when she should be seeing a doctor. ”Are you hungry? There’s amazingly some food somewhere mixed in with the beer in that kitchen if you are.” he offered with a chuckle.

MEL/KIRA :: DONE