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Post by VIRGINIA BENSON on Oct 20, 2012 1:46:23 GMT -5
fighting won't knock you out of my head the memorial service seemed almost never ending as she was now seated by herself in a coffee shop while her blackberry had a different idea about what she should be doing. work was the only thing that was sitting on her mind but her phone’s connection and the service provider did not seem to reach the small café and so she tossed her phone onto the table and glanced down at the black dress that she was wearing, her eyes falling into her lap while her hands were wrapped around the warm cup of hot chocolate that was full, not a sip had been taken. she felt as through her throat was blocked with bile and chocked back tears as she had forced herself not to cry at the service while her parents watched on with a look of disappointment. her grandmother had been the light of the girl’s life all through her childhood, accepting and supporting ginny through everything she did—including when she talked about leaving town, even at a young age. shaking her head, the drink was pushed aside in an attempt to salvage the dinner that was sitting in her stomach though it was not much of anything except what her grandfather had practically begged her to eat. the food just felt solid, like a weight in her stomach as she stood up from the table and practically knocked into someone as soon as she did so. her chair fell to the ground and she growled under her breath, ”for fuck sakes..” [/b] she hissed, shaking her head and reaching for the chair to pick it up off the floor, slamming the legs into the floor before turning to look at the person. her eyes glazed over for a moment and she shook her head, grabbing for her phone, ”I cannot do this..”[/b] she muttered more to herself but her voice was loud enough for the entire coffee shop to hear as she gathered her items in a hasty retreat for the door. [/div][/center]
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Post by quentin shaker on Oct 20, 2012 16:33:15 GMT -5
[/style] [style=width: 325px; text-align: center; text-transform: UPPERCASE; font-family: arial; font-size: 23px; letter-spacing: 1px; color: 000000; Text-Shadow:1px 1px 2px #B9B9B9; margin-bottom:-20px;]My heart is set on you I don't want no one else, And if you don't want me, I guess I'll be all by myself. Quentin had gone to the memorial service, staying to the back of the crowd once he’d realized Ginny was there just so he didn’t end up pissing her off with his presence or something. She had every right to be angry at seeing him but that wasn’t the setting for it. He’d known her grandmother, grown up spending time around the woman with Ginny and he’d respected her and loved her as a grandmother as well in some ways because she’d always listened and helped and been a good strong woman. Leaving he’d gone home to change out of the “respectable” clothes he’d been wearing and into something more comfortable. He had a few errands to run and planned to make a stop to work on Mr. Conner’s car since he’d heard the clunking and knew the man trusted mechanics as much as he trusted the government which was not at all. He’d always been like that and had mastered the art of fixing up the car without the older gentleman ever seeing him that he knew of. He knew the man would stand by the beat up old truck scratching his head when he realized it was running so much better than he had been but that was part of the fun to Quen in doing it on the sly.
One of his other stops was to the coffee shop since grocery shopping was his last stop of the day and he really needed a cup of coffee to keep him going for the day. Stepping inside he didn’t bother looking around as he was distracted by his phone chiming an alert of an incoming message and he was checking it as he nearly ran into someone. Hearing the hissed words and recognizing the voice his eyes shot up from his phone’s screen to look at her faced with the woman he’d loved as a boy and still loved as a man even if they didn’t see each other anymore. ”Ginny…” he said dumbly and watched as she grabbed her phone and said she couldn’t do “this” whatever that was. Seeing her about to leave he reacted before thinking and reached out to grab her wrist. ”Hey wait…Ginny come on…I’m sorry about your grandmother.” he said wanting to talk to her if just for a moment.
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Post by VIRGINIA BENSON on Oct 21, 2012 22:12:33 GMT -5
fighting won't knock you out of my head escaping was the only thing on her mind as she was rushing to gather her stuff up from the table. her palms were now sweaty as she reached for her phone, having to catch it twice in order to keep it from crashing to the floor. shaking her head to him as her name was heard, she rushed a hand through her wavy brunette tresses, ruffling it at the back in frustration and shaking her head, ”don’t..” [/b] she hissed out, not having the emotional or the physical strength to do this, not now. the funeral was fresh on her mind and the pain of it was still going and this was something that was completely unneeded at this moment. sighing, she kicked the chair into it’s spot, her heels hitting the floor once more and was about to walk away, she was almost there too when she felt his touch to her skin. flashes of their time together rushed back to her, and she yanked her wrist away harshly, stumbling back and hitting her back against the handle of the door. ”yea..”[/b] was her reply as he gave his consdolences for the loss in the family, ”funny…she really liked you, it was great seeing you at the funeral..”[/b] she rambled out without even thinking it. it would be one thing if he had attended, and seen him there but seeing him after the services were over and people moved on with their lives really hurt. ”my family really appreciated it.”[/b], giving him a mocking and condescending tone before pushing the door open to the shop and walking out in a haste. the tears started to roll down her cheeks and she quickly wiped them away to prevent too much smearing of her makeup. ”son of a bitch..”[/b] she muttered under her breath, hugging her coat closer to her as goosebumps ran up her skin starting from the wrist that he had touched. [/div][/center]
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Post by quentin shaker on Oct 23, 2012 2:16:03 GMT -5
[/style] [style=width: 325px; text-align: center; text-transform: UPPERCASE; font-family: arial; font-size: 23px; letter-spacing: 1px; color: 000000; Text-Shadow:1px 1px 2px #B9B9B9; margin-bottom:-20px;]My heart is set on you I don't want no one else, And if you don't want me, I guess I'll be all by myself. Quentin watched as she tried to gather her things fast, and fumbled her phone twice before getting a proper grip on it. He had a moment to realize that her current emotions plus the reaction to seeing him again were probably the cause for her haste and while he didn’t mean to upset her he just couldn’t…let her walk away. He’d done that once before and it was what put them in this position. He just wanted to make things right so they could at least talk maybe since he’d missed her every day since she went off for the “big city” life she wanted. When she said don’t he was tempted to just back off, do as she wished and not bother her since he didn’t want to upset her more than she already was. He let her go when she yanked her hand back though and holding up his hands in a “I won’t do anything” kind of gesture. Hearing her though his hands dropped as he stared at her dumbly for a moment shocked and more than a bit insulted. ”You think I wasn’t there? Really ginny?” he asked shaking his head a little and following her as she headed out. ”Back row the whole time Virginia. I was there but I stayed back out of the way because I didn’t want to upset you. By the way? Your mom already told me she appreciated me being there when she kissed my cheek before I left.” he snapped his insult clear in his tone. ”I loved your grandmother as if she were my own grandmother and the fact that you thought I wouldn’t be there…wasn’t there…” he shook his head as he stopped walking. ”Very sorry for your loss. And for upsetting you.” he said and turned to walk the other direction not wanting to do this anymore since he realized his past mistakes made any future situations into a battle zone it seemed.
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Post by VIRGINIA BENSON on Oct 23, 2012 23:55:49 GMT -5
fighting won't knock you out of my head she actually felt a ping of guilt in what she had been saying, understanding exactly why he would not have attended the funeral. it made complete sense after the exchange of harsh words, on her end, in their last departure. ginny despised the fact that he still looked good, he had not changed much but with his words, she could tell that a lot had actually changed. ”no.” [/b] she said with dishonesty, saying no just had this more satisfying feeling and made the words sting just a little less. sighing, she moved out of the coffee shop with a haste, just trying to escape his lingering words that she could not lose in her head. she felt as though everything was falling apart all over again infront of her very eyes and it stung—badly. sighing softly, she looked over to his retreating form and growled under her breath, hating the idea of running after him but not wanting that to be their final words to one another. her pace quickened, her heels clicking against the ground at a faster growing consecutive pace, the sound increasing for him. ”hey shaker!”[/b] she called out to him, grabbing onto his own arm and hoping that the momentum would spin him around to face her. taking a moment to catch her breath, the girl gave a low sigh in his direction and took a large intact of breath, swallowing her hurtful words and letting out a potentially meek, ”thank you for showing your respects..”[/b] but there was more to say. she could feel the words floating between them, everything that they had never said to each other in all the years apart, picking up the phone and dialing only to hang up, driving halfway home before turning around, the countless emails that sat in her draft box—everything was building up. she could feel the tears blurring her sight and then with a blink, they broke free, rolling down her cheek. ”why..”[/b] she whispered, shaking her head and finally releasing his arm, taking a step away from him and the question had nothing to do with her grandmother. [/div][/center]
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Post by quentin shaker on Oct 25, 2012 0:28:05 GMT -5
[/style] [style=width: 325px; text-align: center; text-transform: UPPERCASE; font-family: arial; font-size: 23px; letter-spacing: 1px; color: 000000; Text-Shadow:1px 1px 2px #B9B9B9; margin-bottom:-20px;]My heart is set on you I don't want no one else, And if you don't want me, I guess I'll be all by myself. Quentin couldn’t honestly believe that she’d thought he wouldn’t be there when she knew damned well how much he’d loved and respected her grandmother. He had respected her and her family enough not to want to do anything that could make it a harder day on them than it already was which had meant avoiding going where Ginny would have seen him clearly. He hadn’t wanted to have a face-off with her in that setting and figured she’d appreciate that fact as well…of course he grew up with her so he should have known it wouldn’t be that easy. The two of them could and would fight like cats and dogs when around each other and at one point it had been a comfortable sort of fighting not an angry sort but that was a different time than now and things had changed. He needed to remember that.
Hearing her call out to him and feeling her hand close around his arm he didn’t turn to face her as he gave a tired sigh, ”What Benson?” he asked wondering when first names went the way of the dinosaur with them but not worrying about it too much. Maybe first names were only for people who didn’t disappoint you and let you down when they were supposed to be by your side…yeah that made sense. Hearing her he looked over his shoulder at her a moment before nodding. ”Of course…I loved her. She’d come round just to whack me with that wooden spoon of hers if I didn’t show the proper respect ever.” he said smiling a little to himself remembering all the times he’d been hit by that spoon. Frowning though as he looked at her and caught sight of the tears. He hated seeing her cry and wanted to reach out to pull her into a hug or something but one word, one question stopped him. Knowing it wasn’t about anything to do with this day but a day in their past he took a breath and shook his head, ”Here on the sidewalk isn’t the place to have that talk ginny…so simple answer? Because I’m a dumb-ass.” he said honestly having no issue admitting that fact.
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Post by VIRGINIA BENSON on Oct 31, 2012 1:15:50 GMT -5
fighting won't knock you out of my head the girl needed a filter sometimes, she needed to think about her words before saying them, make a conclusion when she knew all the facts but that was never ginny’s style. it allowed her to rise to the top of her company, it allowed her the chance to meet other people, speak her mind but it also gave her the opening to hurt people, lose their trust, make them feel worthless and that was the exactly what was happening here. virginia was so blinded by the pain that she felt for years after having to drive from myrtle beach to the big city by her lonesome when she was meant to have a partner by her side. she felt the same pain resonate in her chest as she watched his back turn and her mouth fell open for just a moment, she took a step in the other direction but soon found her feet following him, calling out to him, yielding him to stop and explain as well as listen to what she had to say. and virginia had a lot to say, she always did, she was half tempted to let it all out there on the street but holding it all in resulted in the tears to rush to the brim of her eyes, blinking and having them spill over down her cheek. ”…I wish she would have. both of us, even..”, [/b] giving a small chuckle to the memory of the lashings that came with that wooden spoon but she shook her head, ridding the good memory that involved the two most important people in her life—and both had walked out. she wiped at her eyes but it did not help the streaks down her cheek and the amount of tears that continued to drop from her eyes, ”it’s the perfect fucking place! anywhere, a phone call would have been nice, an email explaining would have pissed me off but it would have sufficed..”. the idea of him not writing to her, ”do you know what it’s like to go into an apartment that was meant for two, knowing that your relationship is over and you didn’t even see it coming! you were so ready to leave this place, start a new life and you bailed on me!...”[/b], her jaw clenched now, resisting the urge to shatter his jaw with a good punch that she knew she could muster up with this kind of adrenaline rushing through her, ”you bailed on us. why shaker? why…just tell me why!”, she shouted out, causing people nearby to stop and watch the explosive reunion between the two, something that had been expected since she had drove back into town.[/div][/center]
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Post by quentin shaker on Oct 31, 2012 21:13:57 GMT -5
[/style] [style=width: 325px; text-align: center; text-transform: UPPERCASE; font-family: arial; font-size: 23px; letter-spacing: 1px; color: 000000; Text-Shadow:1px 1px 2px #B9B9B9; margin-bottom:-20px;]My heart is set on you I don't want no one else, And if you don't want me, I guess I'll be all by myself. Quentin knew better than to bite back at Ginny right now, knew she was already upset over the loss of her grandmother and probably from being back in town after being gone for so long by choice. He knew it didn’t help running into him since she had no reason to like being around him after what he’d done but he hadn’t expected a public fight…should have known better considering past arguments. Looking at her now he wanted to just say sorry and somehow help her feel better about everything but he knew it wasn’t his place to do that anymore. At a loss for what to do right now he decided to just make a retreat instead of picking a fight of any sort today of all days. She had different ideas tough it seemed and he was willing to do whatever it was she wanted right now, he deserved any slaps she’d give verbal or physical. He gave a soft chuckle at her saying she wished she would have given the hits with the spoon, ”Me too.” he said honestly and meant it. He’d take a hit from the spoon any day over knowing she wouldn’t hit him with it ever again or seeing the tears falling from Ginny’s eyes right now. The urge to pull her into a hug got stronger as he watched her wipe at those tears then he tried not to flinch or wince as she laid into him knowing he deserved it.
”Ginny…I didn’t think you’d want to hear from me after I changed my mind like I did…figured you would want to just forget about me for awhile…I’m sorry.” he said honestly and frowned as she continued talking about the apartment and their relationship being over and things. He had no answer that seemed good enough to the mistakes he’d made and sighed reaching up to run a hand through his hair. ”I was scared Ginny! Hell the dream of moving away and seeing bigger and better in the world was all yours but I went along with it because I was with you and that’s what you wanted…but it was never me dreaming of those things. I was happy right here and the thought of moving away scared the shit out of me. I wasn’t ready then to do it, to leave and not look back like you were and when it came down to it I chickened and couldn’t do it. That’s why. I never would have bailed on us, never wanted to but you wanted to go and I didn’t want you to hate me for holding you back. You can hate me for not going fine but at least then you got what you wanted…you got to go and live a different life but you didn’t hate me for making you miserable with being stuck here in this small town life that way so you could still be at least a bit happy at the end of the day.” he answered not even noticing the people stopping to watch them and staring rudely.
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Post by VIRGINIA BENSON on Nov 2, 2012 0:33:19 GMT -5
fighting won't knock you out of my head it was not in her nature to just stand and not speak, she was always talking and whether it was to a group of people or to herself, her mouth was always moving. virginia was not able to silence herself most of the time because her thoughts just came flying out of her mouth which little to no thought. it was rare for her to actually sit there and not say anything but she was listening to the male before her, her breath hitching as her body was shaking with the small sobs that passed through her lips as the traumatic day was taking a toll on her body, physically and emotionally. she had just said goodbye to her grandmother, her beloved grandmother, and now had to say hello to an ex-boyfriend that broke her heart. part of her wanted to turn around to his words, her facial expression changing every few words from looking confused to worried to angry and then to just a blank expression at the end of everything. she tried to playback most of the things that he said but her memory had never been all that spectacular and some parts were fuzzy but a lot of it was sticking in her mind and making her body ache with stings. ”I did….i tried, you don’t know how fucking hard I tried to forget you and me and everything that we had shared but it was too much to forget. alcohol didn’t do anything, smoking..for like a week..didn’t do anything, sleeping around. you are just fucking stuck in my head and I hate you for it!” [/b] she yelled out, and proceeded to put her hands upon his chest and give him a shove, ”and I wasn’t!? this town was safe and secure but we were meant to grow up shaker! we were meant to get out of this town and be something more than myrtle beach, more than that fucking tractor, but it was supposed to be together! I had to brave that fucking city all on my own with a broken heart and so many doubts about life!’[/b] she sucked in a deep breath, another sob escaping her lips, she gave him another shove, her brows furrowing and her lips pursing in anger as her jaw set, ”I didn’t want another fucking life, not this kind…I wanted a different life, a different scene but I only wanted it with you!”[/b] she finally shouted, the tears rolling down her cheeks as she took a quick step back, wiping at her eyes with the sleeve of her dress. [/div][/center]
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Post by quentin shaker on Nov 4, 2012 2:13:10 GMT -5
[/style] [style=width: 325px; text-align: center; text-transform: UPPERCASE; font-family: arial; font-size: 23px; letter-spacing: 1px; color: 000000; Text-Shadow:1px 1px 2px #B9B9B9; margin-bottom:-20px;]My heart is set on you I don't want no one else, And if you don't want me, I guess I'll be all by myself. Quentin wasn’t a man who felt the need to broadcast his every thought or emotion; he didn’t need to make sure everyone knew everything so he didn’t bother voicing a lot of his opinions unless he needed them to be said. When asked why he’d done what he did though he had to give her an answer. He couldn’t just say “let it go” or “I don’t want to talk about it” to this. She deserved to get an answer for his waking up that day and backing out of the plan they’d made to move away and start something new. If she thought it was easy for him to talk about though she didn’t know him at all. He hadn’t wanted to watch her drive away hating him for not being in the car with him. He’d wanted to be with her and spend their lives together he just hadn’t been able to go along with her dreams against his fears.
Listening to her was a little like being punched in the gut, repeatedly, but he owed it to her to let her get those punches in because he deserved them. The shove though had him sighing, ”I never said I did it because it would be easy Ginny. I never said you weren’t fucking stuck in my head either because you are. No one can ever live up to you no matter who I meet where I go or what I do you were then and still are today the only one for me. Like it or not that’s just how it is. So don’t go thinking you’re the only one who suffered alright? Because I watched you drive away knowing you’d hate me choked between fear of what you wanted me to do and the knowledge that I was losing you forever.” he said managing to stop himself from yelling back at her. ”You say we like it was ever a choice for me! It wasn’t Ginny it was a stipulation to being with you. Either I went when I wasn’t ready and when it scared me to the point I couldn’t fucking breath or I stayed and lost you for good. That was never a choice…that was a fact of my life that I could never stand a chance at changing.” he said seriously and caught her wrists when he shoved him again. ”You wanted….You wanted…yeah ginny. YOU wanted. It was about what you wanted then never what I wanted. I made my choice it may not have been right right one and whatever to that since I can’t change the past but don’t stand there thinking I’m the only one in the wrong.” he said feeling tears stinging his own eyes at finally saying what he never could have said before when they were younger. He honestly didn’t know how he could say it now but it’s what had come out and there was no taking it back.
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