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Post by jamescopeland on Jul 25, 2012 8:38:59 GMT -5
THERE WAS A TIME I WAS everything [/color] && nothing ALL IN ONE[/center] - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - it had only been a few days since the news about denver had been revealed to james. only a few days since he was left with the question, why would he do it? the talent denver had, and the personality that was left for the ones he had known before his tragic end. the news still left an empty feeling inside of him every time the news found itself enter his mind which was quite frequently to be honest. james hadn’t really ever lost someone in his life that he had known like he knew denver. of course there were the occasional elderly neighbors, but he had never really known them well. denver was different on so many levels. for one, denver was only in his early twenties, not his elderly stage in life and two, denver brought on his untimely death which actually in his thoughts made it all the more tragic. he even remembered the clouds crying the afternoon the news was delivered by giselle and bridget had come to attempt to comfort him... which had only slightly helped but slightly was definitely better than not at all. usually james would not be out driving at midnight but in this circumstance it was inevitable so james was in his car driving to no other than a music store instead of attempting sleep or figuring out some sort of riffs on his guitar. no he was not going to get a new cd for his collection. no, this was much more important. he hadn’t heard from caleb since the news was revealed and when he called giselle told him he was out. there was only one place he knew caleb would be to take his mind off something this late at night and that was of course his music store so james ventured on. he needed to make sure he was ok. caleb and denver had been extremely close and this must have devastated caleb and james knew it might be best to have a friend there for him, then always just having giselle. in this circumstance, the time of night didn’t matter anymore to james. he pulled into a parking space for the music store and turned the car’s ignition off and took a deep breath. he had no idea what to expect. james left his car and silently closed the door. he didn’t want to make any disruptions since it still was midnight and no matter if he was out or not, people were no doubt trying to sleep or at least relax. he moved to the door and took another deep breath before opening the door and hearing the bell ring which made him jump. he wasn’t exactly expecting the noise. he saw caleb at the desk and froze. he had no idea what to say in this situation since he had never really had to give sympathy in person before, only in sympathy cards where the words were already written on the paper and all you had to do was just sign. james looked around the room at all the music stuff nervously. he couldn’t find the words to say. all that left his mouth was a simple quiet, ”hey,” and he prayed that would be enough for the conversation to start
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - this thread template was made by GREEN EGGS AND SAM! of caution 2.0 with lyrics from elton john, it's tagged for CALEB/MEL & its a total of 547 WORDS. you can see what YOURCCHARACTERNAME is wearing right here and all i have to say is sorry for crappiness
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Post by caleb on Jul 25, 2012 10:11:14 GMT -5
Caleb felt terrible. He felt genuinely horrible. In fact, the last time he'd felt worse than this had been when Steph had died. And just as it seemed that his life was leveling out and grounding again... Just as it felt as if he could open himself up to the possibility of loving someone else again, life had to be a proper bitch and remind him of everything he had once lost and slap him with yet another loss. And what was worse about it all was that he felt responsible for this death as well. He felt genuinely responsible, despite the fact that he knew that there were a number of other factors in it all.
With Steph, he'd felt as if he'd killed her because he'd gotten her pregnant. Maybe it didn't seem rational to anyone else and yes, he knew that she had made the conscious decision to have sex with him and then keep the child once she found out that she was pregnant, but it had always felt like he had been the one to taint her. She'd been an angel and he'd been the worst kind of scum when he'd met her. Yet she'd changed him. She'd given him another chance at life. She'd given him everything and, in the end, for loving him, he'd lost her.
And now this... What the hell kind of a friend had he been to Denny? They'd been best mates, in all honesty. Caleb had loved him with all of his heart and yet he hadn't seen how much his friend was suffering. Had he helped push him over the edge? Was there something he could have done to have changed the course of events? Had he seemed emotionally unavailable to his friend? Caleb knew well enough that he'd been a little wrapped up in his own world and life what with Giselle coming into it and his son re-entering it, but he hadn't thought he'd been that unapproachable. There were so many regrets. So many mistakes. And now... Now Denny was just gone and he felt responsible. He was miserable.
Evan was with Giselle tonight and he was a lot better off for it. Caleb didn't want his little boy seeing him like this. Not when he was a train wreck just waiting to happen. And maybe he was wrong to want to be alone right now, but at least he was being productive as hell about it. How the hell was he going to face the rest of the world again when all he wanted to do was follow Denny into whatever afterlife there was. Maybe the world would be better off for it. And maybe those that he loved wouldn't suffer for just knowing him. Christ, he was a bad omen or something. Everyone he loved or cared about left him or died. And the people that really should have loved him hated him to the depths of his soul.
He was putting the fretboard on a custom guitar together at the shop. It was after midnight. He was being ridiculous, but he knew that he wouldn't have slept. He would have paced and cursed himself for not being able to occupy himself. At least here... now... he could do that. But then the bell above the door sounded. Shit. Hadn't he locked that door? Caleb paused in what he was doing and looked up to see James come on in. Instantly, Caleb's throat closed up. Shit. He would not lose it. "Hey." Caleb nodded, afraid to speak at the moment. He put his head down again and got back to work. But then... something just fucking snapped. Something in his mind didn't want to handle what was happening to him again and he, quite literally, picked the fretboard he'd been working on all night up and chucked it across the store as hard as he could.
Naturally, the fret board came apart, all the tuning picks flying left and right before settling down on the ground again. Such a violent display was so completely unlike Caleb. But in the moment after the brief violent outburst, he slumped against the desk and just... fucking cried....
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